A Tasteless World

Good morning and happy Thursday boys and girls. As always, I hope that wherever you are in this crazy rock we call planet earth, you enjoy your day to the fullest. 

As for me? I’ve been trying to find a store, where I can buy food that is sugar free, salt free, gluten free, alcohol free, cage free, egg free, shellfish free, fish free, tree nuts free, soy free, spice free, food coloring free, carb free, cholesterol free, fat free, wheat free, protein free, milk free, hormone free, peanut free, lactose free, dolphin free and any other shit free. As long as it tastes like chicken, I’m OK with it.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

Back For More

Good morning and happy hump day boys and girls, as always, I hope that you have a great day. Remember, enjoy it to the fullest and don’t let nobody fuck it up for you no matter what goes down.

As for me? I’m back at the salt mines for another day of hard labor. Today I’m on the dreaded phones, but like they say, it is what it is. Plus, it beats pushing up daisies or being unemployed at 50. LMFAO! Unlike some people, I just love throwing my age out there. Yes, I’m 50 and proud of it. Other than that, I’m chillin like a villain.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

Dominican Me

Good morning and happy Tuesday kids, I hope that wherever your seat is located on your ride on this crazy rock spinning at 1,040 mph called earth, you are enjoying yourself to the fullest no matter what. For everyone’s sake, just make sure that you hold down your vomit, until you get off the ride.

On a you are not Dominican because… note. Even though on October 19, 1969, I was born in Santo Domingo, The Capital of The Dominican Republic, to Dominican Parents. For years, I have been told by family, friends and even strangers, that I’m not Dominican, that I’m American. You try to figure that shit out. To be honest, it used to bother the living shit out of me, but now, I just have fun with it.

You see, I have been living in The United States of America since the age of 3, which comes up to a total of 47 years. So, everything that I know about my birth country, I have learned from family, friends, other Dominicans, TV and the Internet. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I kind of understand that most Dominicans don’t see me as being Dominican because…

  1. I wasn’t raised in the country.
  2. I don’t know much about the country and its history.
  3. I’ve been told that I don’t have a Dominican accent.
  4. I don’t eat some of the food that Dominicans eat.
  5. I rarely use Dominican slang.
  6. I, as Dominicans put it, like “American music”.
  7. I assimilate and relate to American culture more than Dominican culture.
  8. I really suck at dancing Dominican music.
  9. I only watch Englishlanguage television stations.

Wanna know something even funnier. Back in July of 2019, While in The Dominican Republic on vacation, having a conversation with my wife of 30+ years, she said “I’m from here, you are not”. Knowing my sense of humor, that was a BIG MISTAKE! on her part, because now, every time that I want to mess with her mind, I use what I call the “Remember?… I’m not Dominican” excuse and explanation. LMFAO!

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

Back To The Salt Mines

Good morning and happy Monday boys and girls. I know! I know! I know! IT’S MONDAY… AGAIN!… what the hell is there to be happy about? Well, tell that to those who are pushing up daisies. Anyways, I hope that you enjoy your day to the fullest and remember, that a smile can make someone’s day.

As for me, I’m heading on out to the salt mines to put in my 8 hours of hard labor and deal with anything that is thrown my way. Other than that, I should be chilling like a villain.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!

This Is 50

OK my homies and homettes, as you might know, due to the lost of my wife’s paternal youngest sister in The Dominican Republic, my family and I didn’t have a big party for my 50th birthday, back on October 19th, we went out for dinner and had a good time. The thing is, that my family and friends didn’t forget and so last night, they surprised me at my daughter’s housewarming party.

YES! YES! YES! And YES! La Jefa, aka The Boss Lady, aka The Wife, aka My Wife, knowing that I’m a weekend binge drinker, did give me permission to have a couple of beers, which I truly enjoyed. The thing is, that I had a lot of fun, BUT… I didn’t overdo it. Once I got home, I ate some food and went straight to bed, I didn’t binge drink and I didn’t continue my drinking this morning. Which is my biggest problem with my weekend drinking.

To be honest, today I don’t have a hangover, which is great, because I’m able to help my wife do a few things that need to be done around the apartment, with no problem. Plus I’m looking forward to going to the salt mines on Monday, without a hangover.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!

50 For 50!

Good morning and happy Saturday boys and girls, I am happy to say, that I am 50 years old and today I have been alcohol-free for 50 days, yes, 50 days. I still can’t use the word sober, because I associate it with someone that will never drink again, and since I’m a human being who is full of fucked up flaws, I can’t say what tomorrow will bring.

Later in the evening, my wife and I are traveling to our daughter’s apartment in The Bronx, because family and friends are gathering for dinner and a good time. There will be drinking going on, but no worries kids, drinking is not in the horizon for me. As a matter of fact, I feel that as the days have turned into weeks, I don’t think about drinking much. I’ve had a couple of stinking thinking along the way, but nothing to be concerned about.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!

I’m Not Going Crazy… YET!

OK my homies and homettes, I haven’t been keeping track, but it has been a little over a month since I last took my crazy meds, and to be honest, I feel fucking great. Even when I saw my shrink last week, I didn’t say shit to him, because I feel that I know my brain better than anybody else… well… at least sometimes.

Since I’ve suffered from OCD as far back as I can remember, in the past couple of weeks, I have been able to manage it pretty good. Don’t get me wrong now, I had a couple of Bipolar II hypomanic episodes in the past… as a matter of fact, that’s how we found out that I was bipolar. I really don’t know if I should go back on them, since I’ve been doing so good. But that’s something that I will figure out in time.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!