Good morning and TGIF boys and girls. As always, I hope that you enjoy your day to the fullest and remember, don’t let no asshole mess it up for you no matter what goes down. Keep in mind, that some people are assholes, because somewhere along the line, they lost their copy of the “How not to be an asshole for dummies” book by yours truly.

As for The Big Lebowski? Just like everyday from Monday through Friday, I’m on my way to the salt mines, but compared to yesterday, today will be very different. WHY? Because I’m not on the dreaded phone. Everything should be A OK, unless my stupidvisor fucks it up for everyone, which she usually does. Other than that, I’m happy to have a job that pays the bills, keeps the wife, kids and dog off my back and gives me weekend beer money.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

Back For More

Good morning and happy hump day boys and girls, as always, I hope that you have a great day. Remember, enjoy it to the fullest and don’t let nobody fuck it up for you no matter what goes down.

As for me? I’m back at the salt mines for another day of hard labor. Today I’m on the dreaded phones, but like they say, it is what it is. Plus, it beats pushing up daisies or being unemployed at 50. LMFAO! Unlike some people, I just love throwing my age out there. Yes, I’m 50 and proud of it. Other than that, I’m chillin like a villain.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

Back To The Salt Mines

Good morning and happy Monday boys and girls. I know! I know! I know! IT’S MONDAY… AGAIN!… what the hell is there to be happy about? Well, tell that to those who are pushing up daisies. Anyways, I hope that you enjoy your day to the fullest and remember, that a smile can make someone’s day.

As for me, I’m heading on out to the salt mines to put in my 8 hours of hard labor and deal with anything that is thrown my way. Other than that, I should be chilling like a villain.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!

A Fucked-Up Day!

Good morning and happy Tuesday my homies and homettes, I hate to complain so early in the morning, but to be honest with you, today is going to be a FUCKED-UP! and I mean FUCKED-UP! day at the salt mines. I’m doing what I love to do… working on email and faxes, but due to some unfortunate incident last week. Between you and I “a management fuck up”, we are backed up on work. 

Don’t get me wrong, I get paid to do my job and I love doing it. As a matter of fact, I get along with all of my co-workers here and they all know that I am a team player. I even go the extra mile, by setting up their printers and fixing their computers when they ask me. But the thing with me is, that I don’t like cleaning up other people’s shit. Especially when it’s management’s shit that I have to clean up, because of their lack of knowledge, incompetence and unwillingness to learn. You see, the shit that annoys the living shit out of me is, that when management fucks up, it’s fine and dandy. But when the rest of us fuck up, it’s world war III. 

One thing that I never do, and no one should do, is bring my personal problems to the salt mines and or take my work problems home. Now that shit don’t go with me. Other than that, life sucks and then some, but I’m glad that I’m not pushing up daisies and I have a job that pays the bills.

With that said… I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Butt Fucked At the Salt Mines!

OK my homies and homettes, even though I have been alcohol- free for 34 days today and I am happier than a horny teenage boy in a sex robot factory, I’m not quite in such a good mood this morning. The reasons being, that…

  1. Today at the salt mines, I’m on the phone the whole day, which I hate. I take and do anything anytime, except being on the phone. 
  2. The co-worker that is covering the phone with me today, is known very well in the department, for taking her sweet ass time on every fucking call, in order not to take so many calls. Which means, that I will be butt fucked.

Other than that, everything will be fine and dandy… Once I get THE FUCK out of the salt mines, since I’m taking my last vacation day tomorrow.