This Is 50

OK my homies and homettes, as you might know, due to the lost of my wife’s paternal youngest sister in The Dominican Republic, my family and I didn’t have a big party for my 50th birthday, back on October 19th, we went out for dinner and had a good time. The thing is, that my family and friends didn’t forget and so last night, they surprised me at my daughter’s housewarming party.

YES! YES! YES! And YES! La Jefa, aka The Boss Lady, aka The Wife, aka My Wife, knowing that I’m a weekend binge drinker, did give me permission to have a couple of beers, which I truly enjoyed. The thing is, that I had a lot of fun, BUT… I didn’t overdo it. Once I got home, I ate some food and went straight to bed, I didn’t binge drink and I didn’t continue my drinking this morning. Which is my biggest problem with my weekend drinking.

To be honest, today I don’t have a hangover, which is great, because I’m able to help my wife do a few things that need to be done around the apartment, with no problem. Plus I’m looking forward to going to the salt mines on Monday, without a hangover.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!

50 For 50!

Good morning and happy Saturday boys and girls, I am happy to say, that I am 50 years old and today I have been alcohol-free for 50 days, yes, 50 days. I still can’t use the word sober, because I associate it with someone that will never drink again, and since I’m a human being who is full of fucked up flaws, I can’t say what tomorrow will bring.

Later in the evening, my wife and I are traveling to our daughter’s apartment in The Bronx, because family and friends are gathering for dinner and a good time. There will be drinking going on, but no worries kids, drinking is not in the horizon for me. As a matter of fact, I feel that as the days have turned into weeks, I don’t think about drinking much. I’ve had a couple of stinking thinking along the way, but nothing to be concerned about.

With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!

40 Alcohol-Free Days!

OK my homies and homettes, I am happy as fuck this morning, because today is my 40th alcohol-free day. And even though I celebrated my 50th birthday this past Saturday, I didn’t have any alcohol at all. I really don’t know why, but this time around hasn’t been that hard. Maybe, just maybe, every time around gets easier for me, because I pick up a trick or two here and there.

I know that I am no expert in the subject… per say, but the only advice that I can give out is, not to go crazy thinking about what is it going to feel like, when you get to so and so many alcohol-free or clean days. Just keep it simple and take it one day at a time, in my case, since I’m a weekend binge drinker, I take it one weekend at a time.

With that said my homies and homettes, I am Audi 5000!

The Big Five O!

Knowing my fucked up sense of humor… My daughter got me this!

OK my homies and homettes, even though I know that you don’t give a flying fuck, I’m still gonna say it… Today I’m celebrating my 50th birthday… and yes, my dick still gets hard without the assistance of any erectile dysfunction medication or penis pump . Don’t believe me? Just ask my sexually happy wife.

Anyways my peeps, up to the time that I sat down on my bed, in my birthday suit, to write this boring, crazy, stupid and weird post of mine… with the shopping and everything else in between, my day has been the same as every other Saturday. Except that this evening, I’m planning on going out for dinner with The Boss Lady (my wife).

As of right now, right now! I’m not planning on doing any drinking tonight, but hey, I’m one motherfucking crazy man with a lot of fucked up issues, and because of that, shit can change in a sec. So, AGAIN!… I’m celebrating my 50th birthday, and if you don’t want to lose your hard-earned cash, don’t bet on me. I know I wouldn’t!

Butt Fucked At the Salt Mines!

OK my homies and homettes, even though I have been alcohol- free for 34 days today and I am happier than a horny teenage boy in a sex robot factory, I’m not quite in such a good mood this morning. The reasons being, that…

  1. Today at the salt mines, I’m on the phone the whole day, which I hate. I take and do anything anytime, except being on the phone. 
  2. The co-worker that is covering the phone with me today, is known very well in the department, for taking her sweet ass time on every fucking call, in order not to take so many calls. Which means, that I will be butt fucked.

Other than that, everything will be fine and dandy… Once I get THE FUCK out of the salt mines, since I’m taking my last vacation day tomorrow.

33 Alcohol-Free Days!

OK my homies and homettes, today is my 33rd alcohol-free day and I feel fucking great. I really don’t know if it’s because I haven’t put alcohol in my system for so long, or that I have been off my crazy meds for a couple of weeks, or it could be a combination of both, but I feel really relaxed.

As a matter of fact, even though we New Yorkers are well known for rushing everywhere, lately I’ve been taking my sweet ass time doing anything and everything. For example, on my way to the salt mines and back home, when I’m exiting the train, I move to the side, and let everybody rush out and up the stairs.

Every morning, I leave home earlier than most people do, so I don’t have to be running around like a chicken without his head, if something goes wrong with the trains. So why should I join the exodus? Thinking outside the box, there will always be a train behind the one that just left the station. So why rush? Nobody gets out of this planet alive anyway!

No Matter What!… It Is Still SHIT!

OK my homies and homettes, I can’t sit here butt naked in bed, scratching my sweaty balls, while writing this special post just for you, and lie… Because I feel fucking awesome, happy and proud of myself for being alcohol-free for 31 days. One thing that I must mention is, that for the last two weeks or so, I haven’t had any stinking thinking about drinking. I’ve been chilling like a villain. Not for nothing, but my 50th birthday is coming up next Saturday 10/19/19 (Please don’t send gifts. Unless you really want to), but right now, I am not planning shit yet. Plus, I am not planning on drinking for shit either!

On a holiday note! Today, I’m enjoying my day off from the salt mines, due to the Columbus Day holiday. But as my loyal 1.5 readers know, I don’t sugarcoat shit, because it doesn’t matter if I put sprinkles and a cherry on top of a pile of it… IT IS STILL SHIT! So, I must be honest and say, that I don’t give a flying FUCK about Columbus Day, I just enjoy the paid day off.