Good morning and happy Saturday boys and girls, I am happy to say, that I am 50 years old and today I have been alcohol-free for 50 days, yes, 50 days. I still can’t use the word sober, because I associate it with someone that will never drink again, and since I’m a human being who is full of fucked up flaws, I can’t say what tomorrow will bring.
Later in the evening, my wife and I are traveling to our
daughter’s apartment in The Bronx, because family and friends are gathering for
dinner and a good time. There will be drinking going on, but no worries kids, drinking
is not in the horizon for me. As a matter of fact, I feel that as the days have
turned into weeks, I don’t think about drinking much. I’ve had a couple of stinking
thinking along the way, but nothing to be concerned about.
With that said, I am Audi 5000 y’all!
OK, my homies and homettes, after
a little over a month without seeing my shrink Dr. C, yesterday I was finally
able to see him. The first thing that he said was, that he was happy that I
have been “sober” for over a month. He then went on to ask me, how have I been
able to do it? And what was different this time around? Since he knows that I have
never been able to click with AA, I told him straight out, that I haven’t been
to a meeting.
I did explain to him, that what
has changed is, my perspective on life and how I have been handling things. I
have come to terms, with the notion, that no matter what I do, when shit is
going to happen in life… it is going to happen.
Another thing that I told him was, that I have come to accept, that I can change my feelings, behavior and way of thinking, but I can’t make the people around me change… even if their lives depended on it. By understanding that, and looking at life from that perspective, I feel more relaxed. The truth is, that family and friends will always do whatever the fuck they want to do, but once they fuck up, they can’t blame others, but themselves.
With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!